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The Andy Griffith TV Show Sound Bites



This site provides a huge number of downloadable wav files from over 90 Television (TV) Shows.

NOTE: All logos, sounds & artwork retain their original copyright. All files are for provided for research, educational, criticism, or review for purchase purposes. These files were collected from a number of publicly accessible sites on the web that made no mention or assertion of copyright over these files or the collection. These files are provided on this site under fair use purely for your own personal use and enjoyment. Any copyright assertions on these files belong to the original copyright owners. If you are the copyright owner of a file on this website and you object to it being here please contact me with details and I will be happy to remove the file or provide the necessary citation of the original copyright owner. A full disclaimer is available here.

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Andy Griffith Show Sound Bites (Page 2 of 4)

Do_edward.wav
Jim Nabors: "You know who else he can do?"
Andy Griffith: "Uh, no."
Nabors: "Edward G. Robinson. Do Edward G. Robinson for him, Goober. Listen to this, Andy. Go on, Goob. Edward G. Robinson."
George Lindsey: "Okay, you guys, c'mon, you guys, all right, you guys, beat it, you guys."

Dont_rush.wav
Don Knotts: "Don't rush it, Floyd, don't rush it."
Howard McNear as Floyd: "Well, I'm so busy, I -- business coming in and out and everything... What do you mean, 'rush?' "
Knotts: "I don't want the fast treatment, that's what I mean."
McNear: "This is just a haircut, ya know! It isn't a brain operation!"

Draw.wav
Ron Howard as Opie Taylor: "I'm-a drawin' on you, Sheriff. Draw."
Andy Griffith: "Aw, why don'tcha turn yourself in peaceful-like, son. You'll get a fair trial."
Ron Howard: "Nope. I'm the fastest gun in the West."
Griffith: "Well, you're the shortest. I'll say that."
 



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Ernest_aint_talkin.wav
Andy Griffith: "All right, Ernest T., how you keep gettin' in and out of here?"
Don Knotts: "C'mon, Bass, speak up!"
Howard Morris as Ernest T. Bass: "I ain't talkin', I ain't talkin'. The more you're askin', the more I'm balkin'!"

Ernest_chew_cabbage.wav
Howard Morris as Ernest T. Bass: "I don't chew my cabbage twice. And you ain't heard the last of Ernest T. Bass!"

Ernest_gold_tooth.wav
Army doctor: "Well, Mr. Bass, you have all of your teeth. Where were you planning to put the gold one?"
Howard Morris as Ernest T. Bass: "Oh, right here in front. See these three here? I's gonna knock them out, put the gold one right in the center, leave a space on each side ... that'd stand out better that way. 'specially when I'm dancin'!"

Ernest_here.wav
Howard Morris as Ernest T. Bass: "This here's Ernest T. Bass here."

Ernest_its_me.wav
Howard Morris as Ernest T. Bass: "If you're wonderin' who I'll be, it's me, it's me, it's Ernest T.!"

Ernest_its_me2.wav
Howard Morris as Ernest T. Bass: "Howdy-do to you and you. It's me, it's me, it's Ernest T.! Yee hee hee!"

Ernest_jump_fire.wav
Howard Morris as Ernest T. Bass, singing: "Ole Aunt Miriah, jump in the fire. Fire too hot, jump in the pot. Pot too black, jump in the crack. Crack too high, jump in the sky. Sky too blue, jump in canoe. Canoe too shallow, jump in the tallow. Tallow too soft, jump in the loft. Loft too rotten, jump in the cotton. Cotton so white she stayed there all night!"

Ernest_stand_still.wav
Don Knotts: "All right, Ernest T. Bass, you stand still, and that's an order!"
Howard Morris as Ernest T. Bass: "If a duck stands still you can catch 'im by the bill! Honk! Honk!"

Ernest_t.wav
Howard Morris as Ernest T. Bass: "Howdy, Sheriff. Howdy, Deputy."
Andy Griffith: "Ernest T.!"
Morris: "Surprise, surprise! I can see it in your eyes!"

Ernest_t_bass.wav
Don Knotts: "Ernest T. Bass!"
Howard Morris as Ernest T. Bass: "One and the same -- Bass is the name! Hee hee hee!"

ESP.wav
Don Knotts as Barney Fife: "They're doin' an awful lot with ESP these days."
George Lindsey as Goober: "Whatsat?"
Knotts: "ESP? Extra Sensitive Perception."

Eyes.wav
Woman: "You have the clearest, bluest, most honest eyes. Oh, they're wonderfully clear and blue."
Howard McNear as Floyd Lawson: "Uh yes, they're sort of an azure."

Eyes2.wav
Don Knotts: "Well, did you know that the size of a horse's eyes are the same at birth as they are when he's fully grown?"

Famous_stuff.wav
Don Knotts: "Well, it's famous stuff. A lot of celebrities use that. Radio announcers and everything."

Fed_up_no_thieves.wav
Don Knotts: "Well, I'm fed up, too! I'm sick of the whole thing, too!"

Feel_sorry_4_you.wav
Don Knotts: "I feel sorry for you, baby. You had your chance to fly with me, but you wasn't woman enough. Now the balloon's going up withoutcha."

Fishin_hole_x.wav
Theme song.

Gomer_says_hey.wav
Jim Nabors as Gomer Pyle: "See ya, Ope. Tell your Aunt Bee Gomer says hey!"

Hamburgers.wav
Howard McNear as Floyd: "Maude? Al ... Those hamburgers are ruined! I won't be responsible."

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