This site provides a huge number of downloadable wav files from over 90 Television (TV) Shows.

NOTE: All logos, sounds & artwork retain their original copyright. All files are for provided for research, educational, criticism, or review for purchase purposes. These files were collected from a number of publicly accessible sites on the web that made no mention or assertion of copyright over these files or the collection. These files are provided on this site under fair use purely for your own personal use and enjoyment. Any copyright assertions on these files belong to the original copyright owners. If you are the copyright owner of a file on this website and you object to it being here please contact me with details and I will be happy to remove the file or provide the necessary citation of the original copyright owner. A full disclaimer is available here.

Click here to return to the Q to T index

Seinfeld Sound Bites (Page 2 of 7)

Chilies_outrageous3.wav
Phil Morris: "It's totally inappropriate. It's lewd, lascivious, salacious, outrageous."

Chilies_real.wav
Phil Morris: "Oh, and by the way... They're real, and they're spectacular."

Chilies_shocked.wav
Phil Morris: "I am shocked and chagrined... Mortified and stupefied!"

Circumcision.wav
Michael Richards: "You mean circumcision... I would advise against that."

Cleavage.wav
Seinfeld: "Looking at cleavage is like looking at the sun -- ya don't stare at it!"

Computer_cheer.wav
Jason Alexander: "Well, I got just the thing to cheer you up... a computer!"

Contribute_nothing.wav
Michael Richards: "Look at you... Why don't you do something with your life??... Sit around here all day. You contribute nothing to society!"

Control_the_mail.wav
Wayne Knight as Newman: "All right ... all right. All right, you go ahead. You go ahead! You keep it secret! But you remember this: When you control the mail, you control... information."

Cosmo.wav
Michael Richards: "All this time I'm trying not to be me. I'm afraid to face who I was. But I'm Cosmo, Jerry. I'm Cosmo Kramer, and that's who I'm going to be. From now on, I'm Cosmo!"

Crazy.wav
Seinfeld: "Aw, you're crazy."

Crazy2.wav
Michael Richards: "You're crazy!"

Curt.wav
Wayne Knight: "If I'm curt, then I apologize."

Dangerous.wav
Michael Richards: "I'm dangerous, Jerry. I'm very, very dangerous!"

Del_boca_vista.wav
Several out-takes of Jerry Stiller as Frank Costanza trying to say "Del Boca Vista."

Denial.wav
Julia Louis-Dreyfus: "Mr. Peterman, I don't know what's going on here. I am not addicted to anything."
John O'Hurley as Peterman: "Oh, Elaine. The toll road of denial is a long and dangerous one. The price... your soul."

Dingo.wav
Julia Louis-Dreyfus: "Maybe the dingo ate your baby."
Woman: "What?"
Louis-Dreyfus: "The dingo ate your baby."

Doctor.wav
Julia Louis-Dreyfus: "Do you think I should call him and apologize?"
Seinfeld: "Yes. He's a doctor."

Double-dip.wav
Guy: "What are you doing?"
Jason Alexander: "What?"
Guy: "Did... did you just double-dip that chip?"
Alexander: "Excuse me?"
Guy: "You double-dipped the chip!"
Alexander: "Double-dipped? What are you talking about?"
Guy: "You dipped the chip... you took a bite... and you dipped again."
Alexander: "So?"
Guy: "That's like putting your whole mouth right in the dip!"

Dream_hamburger.wav
Seinfeld: "I had a dream last night that a hamburger was eating me."

Eeehhh.wav
Barney Martin as Morty Seinfeld: "Eeehhh!"
Sandy Baron as Jack Klompus: "Eeehhh!"

CLICK HERE TO GO TO SEINFELD PAGE 3 OF 7

If you need a custom-made sound file,
input "voice-over services" into the search box below.